Just because Merz is telling the truth, you little cry baby

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Farewell to J-Pow, the ultimate "Money Printer Go Brrr" legend. As you pack up your printer and head for the exit on May 15, the entire sub salutes you for your service in making our portfolios look like a Jackson Pollock painting—mostly red with occasional splashes of "soft landing" delusion. We’ll never forget the way you’d walk to the podium, whisper the word "transitory," and immediately send the VIX to the moon while our 0DTE calls evaporated into the ether. You were the only man brave enough to hike rates while the economy was screaming in the backseat, all while maintaining that "poker face of doom" that could make a grown bull cry. May your retirement be filled with infinite liquidity and zero "sticky" inflation. We hope you find a hobby that doesn’t involve incinerating our life savings, though we suspect you’ll just be at the casino, staring at the roulette wheel and waiting for the data to become "sufficiently restrictive" before you place a bet. You were the hero we deserved, but definitely not the one our bank accounts needed. Godspeed, you magnificent hawk; we’ll see you in the breadline. Bull r fuk.

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I think you have to bring a truck load of money to be allowed to cry, I have never checked the fine print.

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Hey bears. Just wanted to say, I don’t hate you guys. It’s all cool, we bulls are trying to make money and you bears are trying to make money too. It’s all good, we can hug on weekends since the market isn’t open. I just hate the way y’all think, the way y’all walk, the way y’all talk, the way y’all sit, the way y’all dress, the way y’all cry and the way y’all smile. FUCK. YOU. BEARS.

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Porsche guys don't cry, they ophthalmologically hydrate. The BMW guys however, just economize by not renewing their turn signal subscription since they didn't use it anyway.

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Sell in May and Go Away, or is it Sell in May and Cry Away?

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new movie: brown boys do cry.

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I wouldn't cry if Bryn slaved me up.

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Don’t be sad OP I sold OKLO at $9 Actually let’s cry together

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and now what? Like true regard gonna cry about it?

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